It Burns!

The last time I was in the same predicament, my fingers were itching their way to my laptop everyday for a fresh new article.This time around, I have nothing to tell..I've completely dried myself up for things to say...

...that's what I thought...

But the truth is, I've completely bled out. All spent up...with all the roller coaster rides I've put myself into...I'm just simply out of energy. All my energy and resources in the past have been spent on the wrong things, wrong goals and the wrong people.

It took another slap in my consciousness to get my shit together.

I've cried myself to sleep too many times already...and I still keep doing the same damn thing! Putting myself out there - being vulnerable without a back up plan till someone came along and made me his back up plan - the worst part was...I completely turned a blind eye - closed all my senses so I could live in the fantasy that prince charming finally has arrived - WRONG!

There is no prince charming...it was all just in my imagination. I was too busy building a fantasy around me that I could not see for myself for what it really was.

Reality bites hard...and it stings...and it burns.

For You

I've gotten a lot of feedback from a lot people with this new blog...mostly positive and encouraging ones...there are a few who feels that it was wrong to "find my way back" again to love after one has ended...

Just to make the story straight, I am not in any way looking for a replacement.

Finding my way back into love simply means loving myself more to be whole again - to be the same carefree person I was once before, albeit scarred  and broken.

When a love ends, it does not end good, regardless if it was a mutual decision between two people. You still get hurt in the end. However strong you might be, you still feel the sting of breaking up. But hey, what are you gonna do about it? Move on, right? NO. Moving on is not easy like flicking a switch. I am not saying you dwell in the past either...

When you find yourself in this predicament, you find reasons where there are none and you try your best to rationalize where thinking goes beyond expectations...it is but a natural reaction.

Finding yourself back into love is not easy.
Forgive yourself first. And forgiving oneself is not an easy feat.

Take time to heal, savor each hurt to be able to understand completely..

It may take a while, hell it may take months...but you are doing this for YOU.

Way Back into Love

Finding yourself in the snake pit is not easy...and it's not easy to get out as well...
But if you have the courage...however weak you may feel...you can always get yourself back up and away from that pit.

Life is not always easy for me...at least in my personal life...finding someone who understands where you come from and what you have been through is so difficult these days...and I always wonder why..when all I want is to be happy...that's what we all want, ain't it?

My experience and knowledge on love is not profound as other people may be...all I know is that when I'm in a situation where I find myself in love with someone I give it my all...

People say talking about it makes it easier to get by, others would say "you are dwelling in the past"...both may be true but maybe...this is my way of finding my way back into love.

Loving myself first is my goal right now...then maybe...just maybe...that someone will somehow come my way.